A couple of years ago I was five-and-a-half months pregnant carrying a baby girl. One day I was a healthy pregnant woman feeling my baby kick and grow; the next day I was dragged to the hospital delivering a stillborn.
We named her MAYYA.
At the time, I experienced a tremendous amount of pain. I would wake in the middle of the night sobbing. Some days my sadness overwhelmed me and I couldn’t leave my room. My other children knew that mommy’s puffy red eyes meant she was crying. I tried to hide it, but I wore my grief in my eyes. That made them sad too.
Then one day I stopped crying. I looked into the eyes of my three healthy children, realized how many gifts I had right in front of me, and stopped feeling sorry for my loss.
In that moment, everything changed.
I decided my loss wasn’t going to destroy me, it was going to shape me.
So I went to the gym. I got back on my yoga mat. I was mindful about what I ate. I started to love my body. I loved more than I ever had before. I created meaning for my life again. Healing my physical body was my way of healing my heart.
I accepted that there are things in life we can’t control and if we spend our time focusing on those things, well, life would be pretty miserable. If we are empowered by the things we CAN control, though, we have the power to change our destiny.
MAYYA was the beginning of my journey. MAYYA+Movement can be the beginning of yours.